Affairs of the heart

by Martin Praetorius

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about

a collection of songs about life, love and longing

credits

released December 6, 2010

Martin Praetorius: vocals, guitars, mandolin, harmonica, low whistle

The Innocent Bastards:
Andy Schmidgen: hammond, piano, accordeon
Marius Goldhammer: bass
Wolf Simon: drums

recorded at Look at Me Studios, Oberhausen, which are now "Tresohr Studios", P&M Studio, Bonn, Working Corners, Essen

mixed at Working Corners by Martin Praetorius
mastered by Fritz Fey at Double-D Mastering, Oberhausen

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Martin Praetorius Essen, Germany

Give. Believe. Surrender. And dream.

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Track Name: Affairs of the heart
Affairs of the Heart

I am a fool, I do believe
In love that’s true
But hey, the truth sometimes
Just stares right back on you
Don’t wanna hurt no one
When push comes to shove
I just can’t stand myself
When it comes to breaking hearts

In affairs of the heart you can’t trust no one
Can’t trust no one least of all me
In affairs of the heart you can’t trust no one
Can’t trust no one least of all me

I turned my back on love
But hell, I ain’t no saint
I do get tempted
And I jump back in again
I tell the sweetest lies
Sometimes I think they’re true
I am the asshole
When it comes to quittin’ you

In affairs of the heart you can’t trust no one
Can’t trust no one least of all me
In affairs of the heart you can’t trust no one
Can’t trust no one least of all me

My friend got married
To his girl the other day
I hope they’ll stick to each other
Through good'n'bad times, night and day
I do believe in love
That lasts eternally
But when I’m in it
I don’t trust no one - least of all me
Hey, don't trust no one - least of all me

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: Sadness for a grin
Sadness For A Grin

Hello old friend summer wind
I'm glad that you come 'round again
I haven't seen you for so long
'cause cousin winter blew so strong
And his cold embrace left a mark
On my skin

Darkness, my lifetime companion
Flip a coin, you lose the gamble
I never seen this way out before
I'm slipping through your haunted door
I've been too long under your spell
I say:: "Good luck, now wish me well"

No more crying, I feel so high, I borrowed me some wings to fly
Who said I was never going to win
I paid my debts, I done my chore, I never felt this way before
And I hope it's never going to end

Now that I know you are mine
And stick with me, come rain or shine
I'm turning in my sadness for a grin

Hello smile on your sweet face
I'm glad you're keeping up the pace
Be my comfort when I'm down
See the laugh behind the frown
My second thoughts on loneliness
They don't mean a thing

I've been down this road before and it ain't what I'm looking for
You're stronger, when you're strong enough to bend
I've got something on my mind that helps me leave the fears behind
Now I found a lover and a friend

Life's a roller-coaster-ride
Now that you are by my side
I'm turning in my sadness for a grin
Track Name: Killin' time
Killin' time

I follow the wind and rain and promises I made
I'm my Daddy's son but I don't play it save
I'm neither rich nor poor nor white trash nor a saint
I take my chances when there's chances I can take

And sometimes I'm killin' time
Sometimes I'm killin' time
The only better thing coming to my mind would be
You and me killin' time
Killin' time

I play my six string and I like to stay up late
Don't fear the darkness but it's loneliness I hate
I've been in and out of love a time or two
I'm back on the smoke and that's because of you

And sometimes I'm killin' time
Sometimes I'm killin' time
The only better thing coming to my mind would be
You and me killin' time
Killin' time

Maybe I am a little crazy
Maybe that is the bit that saves me
From killin' time

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: The seasons
The Seasons

I just wanna get away from here
I just wanna go out and find some place
Where the air is clear
I just wanna get out of here
'Cause the noise of the summer
Is still ringin' in my ear

And the cool days of fall
They just went by
With no place to go
And all I have left
Is your voice
On the code-a-phone

And every time I think of you, baby
It just drives me crazy
Ain't that amazing
With just one look
You just took my heart
And threw it away

And when winter comes
You won't find a single road
That I've not been on
A hundred times or more
I took the turn 'round your house
And I still keep going

And sometimes
It's like you haunt me
In the black of night
I could swear
That I've seen your shadow
By the dashboard light

And every time I think of you, baby
It just drives me crazy
'Cause the seasons you gave me
They turn from fall
To the deep heart of winter
And back again, with no hope for spring

What a waste of gas
It'll last another hour
If I don't go to fast
How I want you near
On the outskirts of town
Where the air is clear

But the only things
That I cling to
Is this song and the wheel
If I could
Only tell you
The way that I feel

And every time I think of you, baby
It just drives me crazy
'Cause the kiss that I've tasted
Was just a small relieve
For the pain
That conquered me then

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: Reason to believe
Reason to believe

Got this job working 9 to 5 trying to make ends meet
Day in day out the same old groove makes your spirits go weak
And the money's just about enough to keep you on your feet
But it'll never really pay for all the other things you need
Then the boss comes up and tells you: "Son, it's not up to me
And you know, I'm really sorry, you see, the bad economy"
I went downtown to see the gypsy to comfort all my grieve
Saying " For this nickel I got left give me reason to believe"

I went down south to make a living but I couldn't stand the heat
The sweat pours down your body but even when you try to sleep
Couldn't rest from all the noise coming up from the city streets
And the juke-box played the same song every day of the week
And the land is dry and dirty no matter how far you drive
Don't they say the grass is greener on the other side
Am I running 'round in circles? Am I cheating on me
When I go looking for some truth and a reason to believe

My daddy worked the same job for 50 odd years
And mum she stood right with him
Through the struggle and the fears
And the years went by stealing time like a thief
Still they go to bed each night
And find reason to believe

Now I ain't about to tell you that I got it all bad
I'm just a little shaky from the dreams in my head
And when your dreams and reality collide
You try to make the best of it without losing your pride
But I got this woman here who loves me and I know her love is true
And I know she is the reason for all the better things I do
She holds me when I'm weary until I fall asleep
And then I get up in the morning with some reason to believe
Track Name: When the moon comes out
When the moon comes out

To fall in love they say is easy
Maybe I'm the other kind
But tonight I'll take my chances
I will ask you to be mine

When the moon comes out
By the old churchhouse
We will say our vows
When the moon comes out

The old graveyard it lies abandoned
Of ancient times it tells a tale
Of lovers, once alive, now faded
And we're all going down the same

When the moon comes out
By the old churchhouse
We will say our vows
When the moon comes out

There's a shadow of a doubt we have to trace
Cause I see your thoughts moving on your face
When you dream – when you dream

I won't say it'll last forever
But then again, who knows, it might
I wanna love you now or never
Don't worry 'bout the end of time

When the moon comes out
By the old churchhouse
We will say our vows
When the moon comes out

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: Hometown Blues
Hometown Blues

Ain't it funny how fast time flies
And I'm still not where I want to be
And all the aims I want to reach, they seem so distant
Getting farther away every day

It seems like I'm stuck to this town
I still hang around the same old places
Same old people that I know
And every new day steals a little of this consciousness
That I belong somewhere else

But someday I'm going away from here
Someday I'm gonna get out of here to lose this
Hometown blues

So many years have gone by since I left school
And the careless life I used to lead
And all the old friends that used to have the same ideals
Have gone the other way

“Life needs security, a place to stay and a woman you can trust”
That's what I hear them talking when I meet them on the street
But I see the hunger in there eyes
For the things they never reach

But someday I'm going away from here
Someday I'm gonna get out of here to lose this
Hometown blues

Oh I can't remember
How I got this fever
But I got voices in my head that make me shiver

Oh I can't remember
How I got this fever
But I got voices in my head... make me lose this hometown blues

I can lose this hometown blues
I'm gonna lose this hometown blues
I can lose this hometown blues

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: I want you bad
I want you bad

I ain't hungry
I can't sleep
Just the simple thought of you it makes me weak

It sounds phony
Sounds so cheap
But I have to admit that I'm in too deep

I feel like a love struck Romeo
But every time I look at you your eyes say no

But there is something about you
Sure I could live without you
But I'm walking a fine line 'tween love and hate
I want you bad

I'm sick of driving
Down your street
Hell, I done all that before and I hate repeats

And I can't stand
All the funky places you meet
All your uptown friends and the way they stare at me

But hey, you got a smile that cuts so sweet
Like a switchblade through my heart until I bleed

But there is something about you
Sure I could live without you
But I'm walking a fine line 'tween love and hate
I want you bad

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: She only came
She only came

It's been so long since I have talked to her
But I can't forget her anyhow
And it's not easy to admit
She's not the last thing on my mind
And though I lost myself in all those words
That have been said a hundred times
Three little words she never said
Are stirring up my mind

Sometimes I think she only came
To do exactly this to me
I find it hard to explain
In any other way
Sometimes I think this world's insane
And love for me is history
She remains a mystery

I've never taken love for granted
I guess I thought she was the one
To turn my nighttime into day
And ease the loneliness
I never felt a pain to cut so deep
And break my heart like prism glass
One crack for every smile I faked
When I was the hurtin' kind

Sometimes I think she only came
To do exactly this to me
And every picture that remains
Turns to shades of gray
Sometimes I think that loves a game
The rules are just not clear to me
Ah she remains a mystery

Sometimes I think she only came
To do exactly this to me
The queen of hearts with all her fame
Is just the luck of the draw
Sometimes I think that loves a game
The rules are just not clear to me
Ah she remains a mystery
Track Name: Walk on water
Walk on water

There’s a distant thunder
Coming down from where the eagles fly
There’s a full moon shining
Through the clouds tonight and the big sky’s high

And I’m tired of walking
In somebody else’s shoes
You turn your back on the ones that you love
And you don’t care what you gonna lose

Now the wind in the cornfield
On the far side of town
Smells like rain and soon the big drops
They start falling down

If I could walk on water
I would give the world to you
If I could walk on water

Now the rain is falling
For, I guess, almost seven weeks
It’s flooding my senses
With a memory so bitter sweet

Was I true to you?
Well, at least I never really told a lie
Through all the pushing and showing
And the struggles we had as the years went by

But I burned all my bridges
I sank all my ships
When you got it all
How come you’re tempted to risk the best of it

If I could walk on water
I would give the world to you
If I could walk on water

© Martin Praetorius
Track Name: Bullet through my head
Bullet Through My Head

I said goodbye much too late
I couldn't take your presence anymore
Love is long gone, here comes the hate
And I hate myself for hanging on
I talked so much, you talked so much
We kept on talking when there was nothing left to say
How come when love is gone, when love is gone, when love is gone
We all tend to make the same mistake

And here I am and I wish the night was over
3 a.m. and I'm heading for the border

And the fear will die
As the years go by
And when I feel real bad
Every thought of you is like a
Bullet through my head

Here's the headache once again
Here's the vodka and the aspirin
One for every false attempt
To turn this ship around again

I couldn't say that it's not as well my fault
But you and me together was just against the odds

In my dreams at night
When my heart takes flight
When I feel real bad
Every thought of you is like a
Bullet through my head
Track Name: Home
Home

I'm homesick now
I left to find
Something clear
And peace of mind

I'm stuck out here
There's nothing new
Being here
Is just a different shade of blue

Can I go home
Guess I'm not a rolling stone
I went to chase a dream
I admit that things are not quite what they seemed to be
I never found a better shade of green

Cigarette
Says "smoke me now"
And time just kills the hours
That I count out loud

Here the skies are blue
And there's no change
For months I haven't seen
A single drop of rain

Can I go home
Guess I'm not a rolling stone
I went to chase a dream
I admit that things are not quite what they seemed to be
I never found a better shade of green

And love has gone away
But I know that it's back for better days

Can I go home
Guess I'm not a rolling stone
I went to chase a dream
I admit that things are not quite what they seemed to be
They just slipped away from me and
I never found a better shade of green